Father’s Day Mug
Today I had breakfast with my son at his daycare. It was interesting to watch him interact with the other kids. I’m so happy he gets along with them so well. Part of the breakfast was the teacher giving me a mug Kiarnan had made the day before. It’s a plastic mug with a paper insert. On the paper is some very abstract finger painting swirls that I really like. It’s a combination of purple, blue and a pinkish-purple color. I like how it turned out quite a bit. In the coffee mug was a slip of paper with the following printed on it:
“My Father didn’t tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it.”
The paper brought tears to my eyes, and I quickly blinked them back as I didn’t want the other dads to see. Yeah. I was a little embarrassed by the sudden emotional surge. I guess it’s because my dad didn’t live a life worth watching, and I’ve promised to not to do that to Kiernan. I’m not a great man by any means, but I do my best to live in a manner that Kiernan can be proud of when he’s old enough to know what’s really going on.
Here’s to hoping and praying I can pull off such a tall order.
No Creative Writing Today
I was really hoping to dig into some creative writing today, but this is the first time that I’ve had a chance to turn on my computer all day long. Yeah. I know. Almost 24 hours without touching a computer. Strange for me.
It’s pretty exhausting being around a newborn. I managed to get quite a bit a sleep last night (6 1/2 semi-contiguous hours) as compared to Kiara (about 3 broken hours) before crawling out of bed for Kiernan’s first doctor appointment. That appointment went well, and everything checked out fine.
Then it was back home, and I ordered Kiara to bed for some sleep while I stayed up and played with Kiernan (as much as you can play with someone that is less than 48 hours old.) He mostly slept while I mostly watched TV. Thank God for TiVo-like devices. This allowed me to catch up on some TV shows, and pause them to tend to Kiernan.
You figure that he’ll cry a little, you’ll check diapers, swaddling, clothing, and pacifiers a little, and that’s about it. That’s really all there is to it (for the parent without the breasts that is), except for the holding, talking, bouncing, and general interaction. You figure that he weighs a little under eight pounds (yes, 8 lbs, 2 oz at birth, but most babies lose 10% of their weight in a day or two, and then start putting it back on) and handling something that weighs about the same as a large bag of flour wouldn’t really tire you out.
Think again.
Somehow spending 6 non-stop hours with a newborn can be really exhausting, but the lack of sleep can’t help either. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not complaining about having a newborn around. (I’m belly-aching a little, and looking for sympathy, though.) I loved every moment of those 6 hours that I had with my son. It was a great 6 hours.
Why only 6 hours? Well, that’s just the 6 uninterrupted hours that I had with him. Then came time for some neighbors to come by, a trip to the store for some stuff for Kiara, and easy-to-fix meals for those moments when warming a casserole donated by a friend in the oven just won’t work. Oh. And diapers. 80 of them. That might last a week. Yep. A week. Oi.
Once I was back from the store, we managed to scarf down some food, play with Kiernan some more, and get him to settle down for a while. Then I headed down to my office (where I’m at right now) to check email real quick, and post this blog.
I’m beat. I normally don’t get to bed until 11:30 to Midnight. It’s 10:30 now, and I’m going to crash as soon as I click “Save” and make sure that the post went through.
Maybe tomorrow I’ll be able to do some writing. We’ll see how it goes. Yep. Maybe. Ha!
PS: I’ve been a member of the local writer’s group for a year now (and three months of showing up to meeting before I joined as a full member.) Yay. A year. Problem is that I’ve only had two submissions during those 12 months. Boo. Hiss. Even worse? It was the same short story (though the second submission was drastically different, and drastically improved thanks to my group’s feedback.) I’ve made a promise to myself that I will have close to 50 pages of submission (50 pages is the limit per member per month) for the next four months running, or I will severely flog myself with something painful… like writing romance.
Kiernan Is Home
It’s been a hectic day that started at 8 this morning when Kiara called to ask me when I was coming to hang out at the hospital with her. I told her that I would be there around 10, and promptly went back to sleep. About 8:45, I crawled out of bed, took care of the animals, and got on the road. I got to the hospital shortly before 10. I walked in just in time to talk to the pediatrician about getting Kiernan circumcised, and we scheduled to do it in a few minutes. I wanted some time to relax with Kiara and Kiernan, but that just didn’t happen. In the five minutes that I had to my family three nurses came in for various reasons. I don’t remember what, but it seemed to me that all three things could have been done by a single person on a single trip.
I went with Kiernan to have him circumcised, and it was actually not as bad as I thought it would be. For some reason I pictured a painted witch-doctor with a bone through his nose swinging a stone machete while chanting. I don’t know why I thought this. It makes no sense, but that was the image that I had. When the doctor turned out to be a grandmotherly type person with a warm smile, and a tray full of cold medical instruments, I was partially relieved, partially embarrassed at myself, and partially eager to see her use all of her tools. I’ll spare you the details, but Kiernan handled the entire process like a champ (yes, the local anesthesia helped), and we were back in our room again.
I was warned that Kiernan would be out of things for a short bit while he recovered from the circumcision, so I was ready to spend some time with Kiara. That didn’t happen. Another doctor, administrator, four nurses, and a cleaning lady all came in. Nope. Not at the same time, and not for the same things. It was all at different times. I never had a chance to talk to Kiara for more than two minutes at a stretch. This was pretty much the theme for the rest of the day.
The last nurse to come in asked Kiara if she wanted to take a bath. Kiara hopped (not literally, mind you) all over that idea, snagged her bath stuff, and ran (ok, shuffled) off to get bathed. One of the nurses that had come in had mentioned that Kiernan had some nose drops to help him when he became snuffly. I had no idea what the drops were, where they were at, or anything. He was starting to get snuffly, so I stepped outside to ask a nurse where the drops were. The nurses desk is right outside our room, but it still took me over a minute to get one of the nurses to stop their gossip long enough to look at me. I was just getting ready to give up when I got the attention of someone walking by. They stepped into their storeroom behind the desk and came out with saline in a tube. Same stuff I used on my eyes after my LASIK. I snagged the tubes of stuff, and walked back into the room. I looked down at Kiernan and was shocked. He was purple!!! Part of my mind panicked, but it was a tiny part. The rest of me jumped into action. He had thrown up some bile while I was trying to get the attention of a nurse, and he was choking on it. I snagged the suction bulb, and quickly went to work. Within a few seconds, he was breathing, sputter, coughing, and being fussy. Oddly enough, he had choked long enough to turn purple, but it didn’t really seem to disturb him too much because I was there.
With that scare over, and Kiara gone, I spent some time talking to Kiernan since this was the first time that we were alone together. I talked to him for about 10 minutes, and then he fell asleep. I guess I’m pretty boring.
Then I fired up my laptop and took advantage of the free wireless at the hospital. For some reason they were blocking every site that I tried to go to (even this one). I figured that their firewall had gone haywire, so I whipped open an ssh tunnel to my Squid HTTP proxy server, and pointed my browser to the ssh tunnel as my HTTP proxy for Firefox. Within a minute, I was browsing anything I damn well felt like, and in a secure fashion. My old server (which is still hosting everything I do) had to be rebooted this morning because of strangeness with the mail server. I’m having some sort of hardware failure on the box. It’s just having too many weird problems. That’s OK. I have a new server that is damn near ready to replace the old one. The big thing holding me up is the highly customized mail server. I’m moving from qmail to Postfix, and there are lots of configs to port over between the two totally different systems.
I spent the rest of the day alternating between working on the mail server (which is almost done), talking to Kiara, talking to Kiernan, and dealing with other 47 people that came into the room (including a maintenance guy that just had to check the serial numbers on the lights in the ceiling now, and no it couldn’t wait until after we were out of the room later that day.) It was actually a fairly frustrating day because I wanted to spend it with Kiernan and Kiara, but I couldn’t. No one would leave us alone in our room long enough for any quality time to matter, and I have to focus on my new server to get it up and running ASAP before the old one gives up the ghost.
Things finally rolled around to the end of the day, and we I clearance to take everyone home. Normally they want babies to stay 48 hours after birth, but Kiernan had no problems with breathing (other than a stuffy nose), activity, movement, jaundice, or anything else. Pretty much every nurse (there were about 30 different ones today) commented on how well he was doing and how he’s doing better than most other babies are doing after a week, and he was only 24 hours old. I’m pretty sure that this was because we didn’t do any pain meds, epidural, or anything like that. He didn’t come out of the womb with loads of drugs in his system.
Kiara and I were very glad to be leaving when we did. The rooms are nowhere near soundproof, and the lady that had just been wheeled into the room next to us was a screamer. I’m not talking in the porn-star-faking-a-climax kind of way. I’m talking in the I’m-a-crappy-actress-in-a-B-rate-horror-movie kind of way. While we were hastily packing and finalizing paperwork, we overheard that she was only dilated to 7 cm. That means that if she went on a “normal schedule” that she had at least another three hours to go before she could start pushing…. Yeah…. Three more hours of screaming before the real fun begins. I feel sorry for the people in the room with the screamer.
The drive home was pretty much the longest stretch of uninterrupted talking that Kiara and I had all day long. About 30 minutes of pure bliss other than the fact that I was worried about Kiernan. I guess he likes car rides (yay!) because he was zonked out the entire ride home. After the choking incident earlier, I was really worried. I managed to sneak my hand into the back seat, and put a finger in his mouth. He sucked on it a bit, and that assured me that he was fine.
Kiernan, Kiara, and I ended up getting home about 7 tonight. Kiara had to go fill a prescription, and I had tons of unpacking to do. It took me most of the night to get things unpacked between taking time to talk to our parents on the phone, a quick visit from our neighbors (who brought yummy turkey soup!), and taking turns taking care of Kiernan.
It’s been another long day (I’m sensing a pattern here), and it’s nearing 11:30 at night. Here’s to hoping that we can get some decent sleep tonight and into tomorrow morning. I’m going to try my best to let Kiara get more sleep than me since she put out more energy than I have the past couple of days. Unfortunately, we have to get up on a schedule tomorrow. It’s Kiernan’s first pediatrician appointment. Seems kind of fast to me, but that’s ok.
I’ll give an update tomorrow on how Kiernan’s first day at home went.
PS: The animals seem to be handling Kiernan with various reactions. The dogs are curious, and gentle. Two of the cats are curious and scared. Two of the other cats are so scared that they hardly come out. The fifth cat is too stupid to know the difference. The birds are pretty freaked out, which I think is a little funny. With time, they’ll all come to deal with Kiernan in their own way (except for the stupid one, which will just know that it’s another person to scratch his head.)
Kiernan Arrives
Kiernan (the online handle of my son) has arrived to the world.
First the vitals:
- 8 lbs, 2 oz.
- 21 inches long
- Born at: 2007-11-26 3:44 PM
- Apgar sccores: 8 and then 9 due to colorization.
- Song playing from my mp3 collection at the time of birth: Truth Hits Everybody by The Police
- As our doula said, “He has all of the factory approved parts.”
Mom and baby are doing wonderful, and I’m doing pretty good myself. Of course, I did lots less than either one of them, so I’m not taking any credit for anything other than being a cheerleader and water boy during the process.
The longer story:
Kiara woke me up at 3 AM today to tell me that she had been in early labor for an hour, and needed my help getting around. We walked around the house, laid in bed, tried various positions, and kept each other company until about 6 AM. That’s when we called our doula, and told her what was going on. She said to go back to bed, and try to get some rest because we were both going to need it. We laid in bed, and really didn’t get much in the way of rest.
8 AM hit, and the contractions got closer and closer. We called our doula, and asked her to come over. She got on the road, and headed our way. While she was on the way, I took care of all of the animals. When she got there, she started taking care of things. I was finishing up with the animals when Kiara threw up, but the doula came to the rescue to clean the mess. I managed to get a clean shirt on Kiara, and about that time the doula looked at me and asked me if I had eaten. This was about 9:45 AM, and I had not eaten even though I had been up for over 6 hours.
She told me to go into town to get some hot food, and I also had to get some gas, Monster energy drinks, and some cash from the ATM. I did all of this, and got home about 10:45. As soon as I walked in, the doula told me that we were going to the hospital soon. I asked how soon. She said, “now kind of soon.” I asked her if we could leave in 10 minutes. It would take me at least that long to get my stuff together for the trip.
Fifteen minutes later we were out the door. I still hadn’t had a chance to eat my food, tell anyone what was going on, or anything like that. The drive to the hospital was uneventful as far as the typical TV show drama goes. I managed to contact my mom, Kiara’s dad, Kiara’s doctor, and a few other folks on the drive to the hospital.
We arrived at the hospital a few minutes after 11:30 to find out that Kiara was fully dilated and ready to go. We got up to a room quickly, and labor and pushing started almost right away. It was a blur of four hours. Lots of grunting, groaning, pushing, holding of breath, cheerleading, massaging, positioning, and monitoring.
Kiernan finally came out at 3:44. Things were great, except for the cord around the neck. The doctor jumped on the problem before I even realized that it was a problem. Everything worked out, and the doctor’s calm and confident demeanor put me at ease. This allowed me to put Kiara at ease, and things were good.
Next came all sorts of action, and I really wasn’t sure what I was supposed to do next. Our doula nudged me and told me to stick with Kiernan, and she would stick with Kiara. I did just that. Kiernan was being fussy because he had swallowed (but not inhaled) some meconium, and they had to suction it out of his stomach. He didn’t like the tubes, suction, and other handling, but so long as I was there talking to him, he would stay mostly quiet. I wish I could have recorded what I said because I honestly don’t remember. I just know that I was a proud papa to be looking down on my son.
Things calmed down after that, and we got to get a little rest before I started making phone calls to friends, family, etc. The phone calls were all pretty much the same as this post: vitals, short story, current status of everyone, and goodbyes so I could make the next call.
That’s pretty much where I’m going to end things for now. I’ll get some photos up as soon as I can, which may be tonight, or may be tomorrow morning. I’ll shoot for tonight.
Correction: Water NOT Broken
Kiara corrected me when I got home last night that her water had not broken. What had happened was that her mucus plug fell out. I’ll spare you the details of what a mucus plug is. If you really want to know, this page can fill you in.
When her water does break, I’ll make sure to let you know…
The panic can stop now… Back to your regularly schedule programming.
Water Broke
Kiara just called me. Her water broke. No contractions just yet, though. We’re still a ways away from greeting our son for the first time. I’m at Kolvedic’s and Jhianna’s house playing Alternity right now. We’re about to wrap up, and I’ll head home as soon as I can.
More news on the way as it develops.
Sorry to break from the NaBloPoMo pattern, but I had to share this news. I’m also dangerously close to hitting the Midnight mark for today, I just didn’t have time to do any character creation…
gnat
Random word list:
obscuration
domboc
gnat
Kies
undergage
Word chosen: gnat
Definition: any of certain small flies, esp. the biting gnats or punkies of the family Ceratopogonidae, the midges of the family Chironomidae, and the black flies of the family Simuliidae.
Free association word list:
flies
annoying
dead
dying
fat
buzzing
freeze
winter
snow
warm weather
odd
thankful
hope it holds
November
Kiernan coming soon
meeting with doula
nice lady
packed for trip
heavy pack
NATO pack
3-day assault pack
MRE
emergency food
good eats?
probably not
survival
camping
dog food
Boy Scouts
Be Prepared
Word chosen: NATO pack
Writing:
A month or two ago, I realized that I needed a bag big enough to carry all of the stuff that we’re going to be taking to the hospital when Kiara goes into labor. I knew that I’d have this bag, my laptop bag, and Kiara to get into the hospital without killing myself. That’s when I decided that I needed a back pack that could handle a large load.
Instead of running to REI to buy an overpriced frame pack, I decided to hit the local Army surplus store. I had in mind to pick up an ALICE pack since I had heard about them, and I knew that they could hold most of what a solider needed for a day or five in the field. If it can help keep a soldier alive, then it can probably carry what I need.
I got to the store to find that ALICE packs are frame backpacks. Ok. Don’t need that for this trip. However, I’ll keep it in mind if I ever do the camping thing. While looking around the store, I came across a NATO pack and a 3-day assault pack. The 3-day assault pack was really, really nice, and could hold TONS of stuff. Unfortunately, it ran $90 for one of them. I decided that Kiara would castrate me if she found out that I had spent that much on a pack.
That left me with the NATO pack for $20, which is the option that I went with. The NATO pack wasn’t quite large enough to hold everything, but it comes close. I have a small bag that holds the rest of the gear that we’re taking with us. Fortunately, that small bag sits perfectly on top of the NATO pack, and one of my bungee cords holds it in place nicely.
We added the last bits of stuff that we need for the trip to the hospital into the bag this afternoon, and cinched all of the flaps and compartments closed. Things are packed up, and we’re ready to go.
Now if we can just keep the weather nice for a few more weeks until we’re at the hospital things will work out nicely.
PS: Not used to posting on the weekends. Hah! Barely made it with a few minutes to spare.
whitrack
Random word list:
khi
Zorn
enjoy
nouveaute
whitrack
Word chosen: whitrack
Definition: a weasel; ermine or stoat. (British dialect)
Free association word list:
ferret
Mischief
Trouble
Loki
Nikita
Palladium
Divinity
Picasso
cats
cat shows
Tonkinese
Ocecat
trouble maker
insane cat
fresh meat
tasty meal
orange beast of stupidity and terror
piss master
locked away
prison
snow bound
winter
harsh
white
ugh
cabin fever
Word chosen: ferret
Writing:
Kiara and I used to have two ferrets, Mischief and Trouble, as pets. Mischief was a tiny little thing (as far as ferrets go), and Trouble was fairly large ferret. Mischief was the cutest thing you’ve ever seen, and Trouble was down-right crazy, but he was fun to be around.
One of the problems with Trouble was that he was deaf. We got a good deal on him from a pet store in Montana, and the owner of the store told me that he had taken him back two times already, and would not take him back again. Trouble had been returned for biting the previous owners. Dumb owners. Ferrets bite. Duh.
We got him home and after a few days, we noticed that he would not react to someone knocking on the door, running the vacuum, or other loud noises. I snuck up behind him with some pots and pans, and banged them together. It didn’t even phase him.
He was deaf.
Ahh….
That explains his sudden lashing out when someone would pick him up from behind. He couldn’t hear them coming, and it was a startle reaction, not a mean one. He loved being picked up, and loved cuddling. He just wanted to know that it was coming.
In three of the four places that we lived with the ferrets, they had their own room. Mischief would come running when we called her name, but we had to flick the lights on and off in the room to get Trouble’s attention. It worked amazingly well. I think it was mainly because we usually had cooked noodles with us when we did it. Mischief was a picky eater, but Trouble was a cavernous pit when it came to food, and he really loved the noodles.
Maybe I should have named him Noodle instead.
It’s been quite a few years since we’ve had ferrets in our lives. I miss them quite a bit, but I’m not sure that they would be a good thing to have around a newborn, or even a small child. Maybe Kiernan (my soon-to-arrive son’s online handle) will want one when he’s older… We’ll see how it goes.
rejoices
Random word list:
underliking
ill-effaceable
flower-embroidered
ped
rejoices
Word chosen: rejoices
Definition: To feel joyful; be delighted.
Free association word list:
happy
joyful
Joy
My Name Is Earl
Randy
Earl
Prison
Uncle Nathan
son’s name
nice
helpful
giving
caring
wise
generous
donations
charity
water buffalo
scary woman
warm bowl of water
not going there
Vince
J.J.
skating
youth
fun
careless
Word chosen: Uncle Nathan
Writing:
My Uncle Nathan was my mom’s little brother. After a long hard life, he passed away in early 2000. I don’t remember the date, but I remember the day. I was out of work, and I had two job interviews that day. I was dressed nice, had tons of copies of my resume with me, and I was ready to go get employed. I decided to check my email one last time before leaving the house to make sure that nothing had changed on the time or location of my two interviews. I only had one new email, and it was an email from my Aunt Jane telling me (and others) that my Uncle Nathan had passed away.
I was crushed. Nathan was my favorite uncle growing up, and into adulthood. I knew that I needed one of these two jobs that I was interviewing for, so I pushed back my tears, and focused on what needed to be done. Once I was done with the interviews, and I was safely home, I re-read the email, and sat in my chair and cried for quite a long time.
My Uncle Nathan grew up in an abusive home. My biological grandfather was an abusive drunk, but my mom told me that the massive violence that he was capable of was never directed at my mom or Nathan; they were too young. However, he grew up watching this violence, and I’m sure that affected him. Fortunately for everyone involved my biological grandfather bailed out when some of the children were very young, and my Mama Stella managed to find the great man, Papa James, that I grew up knowing as my grandfather. I never knew that he wasn’t my real grandfather — wait… He was my real grandfather, but just not biologically.
Back to the point…
Nathan always had an awesome work ethic. He was always employed. He always had hard jobs though. He was a mechanic, welder, construction worker, and things like that. I don’t say that in a derisive way, though. I have respect for anyone that shows up for work on time, puts in an honest day’s work, and then goes home to be a good man. I don’t care if they are a brain surgeon or a welder. A hard day’s work goes a long way.
When I was fairly young (maybe 7 years old or so?), my Uncle Nathan was driving past a cop writing a ticket, and his work truck back fired. The cop thought that Nathan was firing a gun at him, and immediately chased him down. When Nathan pulled over, he cop yanked him from the car, busted his head open on a curb, and started cuffing him so violently that Nathan’s wrists were slashed open. Nathan, trying to defend himself, knocked the cop down. The cop hit his head on the same curb, and was knocked out. In a moment of panic, my Uncle Nathan ran. He jumped back in his truck and took off.
When the cop came too, he radioed out about an “armed and dangerous” criminal on the loose that had “assaulted” him. Nathan was caught not too much longer later, and he was convicted of assaulting a police officer. He was sentenced to 7 years in prison. This devastated our entire family because we all knew that there was no way that Nathan would ever do something like that except for in self defense. I remember driving all the way across Texas to Huntsville a few times during his incarceration to visit him. He seemed beaten, broken, and down. I know that he was putting on a brave face for all of us, and we seemed to genuinely cheer him up a bit. It’s hard to be cheerful in a place like that though.
Nathan, being the man that he was, was released early for good behavior. I was around 9 or 10 years old when he was released. He hopped on a bus, and came home to Midland. He never told anyone that he was coming home. His very first stop wasn’t my Mama Stella’s house. His first stop was to see my mom and me.
I remember being the first to the door to open it when the doorbell rang. I opened the door, saw Nathan, and screamed in delight. Nathan charged through the door, grabbed me up in a huge hug, and was so happy that he was crying. Mom, Jill, and my step-dad jumped to their feet at all of this. Mom was so happy that she started to cry right away too. My step-dad, who had never seen Nathan before, thought that we were under attack or something. My mom had to hold him back while things were explained. It was like our family was complete — for a while — again.
I remember that we all went out to dinner that night, and Nathan ate a huge steak. He hadn’t had a good steak in a very long time. Unfortunately, he hadn’t had any spicy or greasy food in his system for a few years. The steak really tore him up, and he ended up throwing up for a while that night. Once the grease was out of his system, he was back to normal.
We spent the next week driving everywhere together. He was seeing old friends, family, and just talking to me. Looking back on it, he was trying to recapture a sense of normalcy. We never did talk about his time in prison. He always wanted to know what was going on in my life. He was probably the first adult to treat me like an adult, and this may be one of the reasons that I love him so dearly. He would intently listen to me ramble on about elementary school, GEM, friends, computers, and all sorts of other stuff. He always told me that he knew that I would make it big because of my smarts, and that he was very proud of me.
This made me very happy. I finally had someone that was treating me as an adult instead of a kid. This is probably part of what helped me stay on track. I knew that someone was proud of me, and had high expectations of me. I could disappoint myself without much repercussion, but there was no way that I was going to let Nathan down. No. Way. Ever.
The years passed, and Nathan moved away, but he always made a point to stay in touch. During the low times in my life, I would avoid him because I didn’t want him to see me failing. Maybe if I had talked to him, he would have had some words of wisdom for me to help me out. I just didn’t want him to see me that low. I didn’t want to disappoint him. I couldn’t let that happen.
When I finally got my life back on track, I was in San Antonio, and he was in Austin. We saw each other about once a month, and he was back to telling me how proud of me he was. He always had a different junker car that would barely make it around. I’d always ask him what happened to his hold car, and the story was the same, “Someone else needed it more than me, so I gave it to them.”
Life took some turns for me, and I ended up in Colorado by way of Montana. I never did talk to Nathan again after I moved to Montana. He didn’t have a phone, and I never did have his address. I thought of him fairly often, but after the email that contained the announcement of his death, I wished that I had put some effort into contacting him more often.
Nathan was an important part of my life, and I wish he was still around to tell me how proud he is of me. I wish he was around to see the next Nathan, my son, come along, and watch him grow up as he watched me grow up. I miss him dearly. I have a handful of photos on my cork board in my office, and Uncle Nathan is one of them. He’s at the top of the board, above all of the cruft and miscellaneous stuff that I have on my board. He’s at the top because he is one of the most important people to me in the world.
Looking forward, I can only hope that I manage to raise my Nathan to be as kind, generous, helpful, hard-working, diligent, and wonderful as the uncle that I remember so fondly.
wahine
Random word list:
flavanilin
night-prowling
forepad
trasy
wahine
Word chosen: wahine
Definition: (in Hawaii and Polynesia) a girl or young woman.
Free association word list:
hula skirt
luau
food
roast pig
pineapple
fruit
fruit cake
breaking a tooth
dentist
oral surgery
implants
bone graft
not fun
expensive
broke
paycheck
income
401k
retirement
old age
endless vacation
RV
road trips
travel
good times
summer vacation
Word chosen: Road Trips
Writing:
When I was a kid I spent most summers with my paternal grandparents. There were some exceptions, but not many. During these summer vacations, my grandparents and I would pile into the RV of the year*. Our destination was always Colorado. I’m not sure why.
We’d trundle across New Mexico heading for different parts of Colorado. We’d head to Colorado Springs, Durango, Pueblo, and various scenic parts of the state. The trip there would invariably take a full week. We’d stop at every little cafe, historical marker, scenic outlook, and tourist trap. Every. Single. Year. It got to the point where I would know what historical marker we were at without even getting out to look at it.
Thinking back on it, I’m sure that my grandfather was just looking for a chance to get out and stretch his legs. He had to sit in the driver’s seat the entire time while I was free to romp and play in the back of the RV. I’d spend most of the time reading books, or coming up with some great** D&D adventure.
After creeping across New Mexico, we’d finally reach our destination. We’d spend about a week there. I always had a blast hiking, fishing, rafting, walking the small towns, and just hanging out with my grandparents. It’s one of the more innocent times of my life, and I really miss it quite a bit. I can sometimes recapture those moments in memories, but they’re distant and fading.
Maybe with the coming of my son in less than three weeks, I’ll be able to re-experience those wonderful times through his eyes. Everyone seems to want to live vicariously through their single friends that come home with a different hottie every night, but those dreams are behind me. I no longer envy those friends, but I don’t find them pathetic either. They are what they are.
I now look forward to the days where I can recapture a little innocence, wonderment, and excitement at “the new stuff” (even if it’s old to me) through the life of my son. Most people ask me if I’m nervous, anxious, scared, or frightened at the prospect of having a child. I do have a little of that, but it is background noise compared to the things that I’m looking forward to with excitement, eagerness, and longing.
* – My grandfather always seemed to find something newer and better every spring, and he would trade in the old RV for a new one.
** – The word “great” is relative. I’m very sure that my first hundred attempts at creating a D&D adventure were anything other than “great” by any standard. They seemed great to me though. I was always known as the guy that could use the widest variety of creatures in a single dungeon. Of course, there was no logical explanation for the zoo-like collection of critters, but my players didn’t care because even the “wild dogs” that were roaming a 10×10 room on the 4th level of the dungeon came with at least 2,000 GP worth of treasure. Yeah. I know. Pathetic. Don’t scoff. I was in elementary school, ok?
