Random Thoughts
Here are a few random thoughts that have popped in my head since Sunday morning:
Will we be having twins? They run in Kiara’s family, and I found out from my mom when I told her about the baby that her mom had twins (that died in infancy) and that my great-grandmother was a set of triplets. I didn’t know any of this before. I guess we’ll find out in the 6-8 week mark.
Maybe it’s the darker side of my psyche, but I hope nothing bad happens to Kiara during the whole process. While I want a child, I don’t want to “trade” Kiara for a newborn. If something happens, I’ll deal with it, but giving birth to a child is no small feat. I worry about these things.
Will I have a son or a daughter? I’m hoping for a son, but I’ll be just as happy with a daughter. I’m thinking that it will most likely be a son. My grandfather is 1 of 5 sons. My dad is 1 of 2 sons. My dad has 3 sons. My genetics seems to have a strong leaning towards boys. I guess we’ll find out around the 20th week.
Will my child have genetic problems? I’ll love any child that I have, but, like any parent, I hope for a healthy, happy, intelligent, caring, and wonderful child. If something less-than-perfect happens, I’ll adjust, and I’ll love the child just as if they were “perfect.” Then again, maybe that will be God’s vision of perfect for my child. We’ll have to find out.
I’d like to raise my child with some religious grounding. I’m not talking a Bible-thumping, God-fearing, Christ-is-all type religion. I want them to know that there is a God, that Jesus can be a source of wisdom, learning, love, and guidance. My child will get all of the science, evolution teachings, and other stuff like that in school. I want them to know and love God. That means finding a church, getting them baptized, and actually going on a regular basis. I’m hoping to find a small church. I don’t want to go to some big church that is more like a corporation than a House of God. I don’t have any religious friends, so I don’t have anyone to ask. I guess I’ll have to start “shopping around.”
Speaking of school, I think I want to home-school. We’re still years away from figuring that out, but it’s something to think about.
Will I raise a child that cures cancer?
Will I raise the next Ted Bundy?
Maybe my child will be the first human to step foot on Mars?
Names. Names. Names. We’ll need to know the sex as soon as possible. Every time we’ve gotten a new pet, it’s taken a few weeks to come up with a name. We can’t do that with a baby. I’d like to pick a name that means something to us. Like “Denise” as a middle name if it’s a girl after my little sister. If it’s a boy, I’d like “Luveal” to be his middle name after my grandfather. It’s something that we’ll have to work out. We’ll have about 20 weeks to figure out the name once we know the sex of the baby.
The due date is November 21st. Will we have snow around that time? Will we be able to get to the hospital when it comes time for the baby? We’ll have “Big Red” (a 1999 Chevy Suburban) by that time, so we’ll be able to handle most snowstorms unless it’s really bad.
Will my child be good at sports? Will he/she want to try?
I want to teach them chess, but I’m not going to push it on them. Maybe they’ll want to play and learn from me.
What kind of hobbies will my child have? Will I have the financial security to support them in all of their endeavors like my grandparents supported me through all of my “I’d like to try that” moments?
I bet my child will need braces. I needed braces, as did Kiara, and so did my father. I’m not worried about the cost, but kids can be cruel, and the jokes can be endless.
Speaking of the cruelty of children… Will my child be kind and generous or mean and spiteful? I’m going to do my best to instill in them a desire to help others, but I have this slight fear of failure. Maybe this fear of failure will help drive me to do the right things when necessary.
Godparents. Do we need godparents? What are godparents? How do we pick them? How do we ask them?
What happens to my child if both Kiara and I are killed before they are able to grow to adulthood? I assume we’ll set something up in our wills, but how do we pick the new guardians? How do we ask them? How do we pick one couple over another without hurting anyone’s feelings?
Speaking of a will, I guess it’s a good time to get one in order.
Saving money. We’ll need to save money for all sorts of things. I’m going to quit smoking for good. That will save me about $15 a week. I’m going to take that $15 a week, and put it in a jug for the child. What will I spend it on? Not really sure, but it will be there for them when they need it. It’s not enough for a college education, but it might be enough for a used car by the time they turn 16.
Will they share the love of animals that Kiara and I have? I hope so because the child is going to be stuck with sharing space with lots of cats and a few dogs. I’m sure that they’ll do just fine with them.
Aunts and Uncles. Kiara is an only child, and I only have three brothers left back in Texas. Our baby is really not going to know his/her uncles too well, but there is going to be a huge support team of friends here in town. I grew up around tons of friends of my mom and dad. I knew that they were not blood relatives, but they were like aunts and uncles to me. Our baby is going to have the same. I thought about listing everyone here, but I knew I would miss some people. I’m just looking forward to my child falling in love with all of the people in my life just like I love them.
How many cavities will they have as a child? I had my fair share, but I hope that their teeth are not going to be as bad as mine.
How many times will they run away from home? How far will they go before they decide to come back? Will I know about it?
What about sneaking out at night? I did it. I’m sure Kiara did it. Most people that I know did it. I know that they’ll do it, but I hope that they don’t get into too much trouble or danger while roaming the night.
What will they laugh at first?
What will be their first word?
I now have even more reason to live a good life, and I hope that they can be proud of me as their father. I’ll always love them, but I also want them to live a life that lets me brag about them to my friends until my friends get tired of hearing about my children.
How tall will they be?
What color will their hair be?
Will they look like me or Kiara?
What will their birthmark be? Where will it be?
What will they do for a living?
Will they go to college?
What kind of grades will they get? Will they take some weird math that they need help with, but it’s over my head on how to do it? Will I have to go back to school in order to properly help with homework?
If I have a son, will he want to run around, play sports, do Boy Scouts, and be active? Or will he want to sit in front of the TV and veg out?
Speaking of TV, it will not be the babysitter in our house.
As soon as we figure out the name, I need to get a domain name, and an email address setup for the baby. I’d like to email him/her my thoughts on him/her as he/she grows up. I think it would be interesting for him/her to read when he/she gets old enough.
If I have a daughter, will she also be active in the world? Will I be invited to participate in stuff like the Girl Scouts? I’d hate to be excluded from something as fun as that just because I’m the dad.
I enjoyed acting quite a bit when I was younger. Will they share this joy with me? Will they want to go to movies with me and enjoy them as much as I do? Of course, I’ll have to be more discerning about what movies I go to if I have a child with me. Most of them will probably be cartoons.
Speaking of cartoons, I guess I’ll have to get over my aversion to animation and start loving the world of computer and hand-drawn movies. I guess Kiara will now get her wish to start collecting Disney movies. I just hope that they continue their habit of re-releasing classic cartoons, so that our child can enjoy them. Maybe I’ll actually get to see the end of Bambi in the future without falling asleep. (I’ve seen Bambi about 5 times, and I’ve never made it to the end. I have no idea how it ends.)
Will Kiara’s folks (who are about retirement age) want to move to Colorado to be near their grandchild? I’m not sure how I feel about this. Sure, the extra help would be nice, and I like them well enough. I’m not sure I could handle seeing them every-other-day, though. If this does happen, I’ll adjust to it. Lots of changes in my life are coming, and this is just a small one.
How old should my child be when I have the sex talk? The drug talk? The talk about how to avoid certain people?
There is evil in the world. I want my child to be able to recognize it when they see it, and avoid it if possible. I have a friend from back in Texas that was not raised with this ability or skill. He’s been taken advantage of many times, and I feel sorry for him for this lack of his education. I hope to avoid this with my child, but I don’t want them to be paranoid, frightful of the world, or overly cautious. They need to love to live life without fear, but it needs to be tempered with a good dose of wariness.
What other questions will I have? I suppose they’ll come to me when they come.
